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What I Wish My Pastor Would Say About Mothers

Three women share how they'd like you to deal with Mothers' Day

What I Wish My Pastor Would Say About Mothers

Ah, Mother's Day! It's sweet, it's happy, it's beautiful … and it's tricky. Some women are delighted to come to church on Mother's Day. But some women are hurting so deeply that they'll skip church. How do you shower love on moms but show compassion to the wounded? We asked three ordinary women, "What do you wish your pastor would or wouldn't say on Mother's Day?" Then we just let them talk. You won't find any pastor bashing here, but you will find some practical, helpful advice from mature women who love Christ and his church. Here's my encouragement: based on these perspectives, try to make one positive change in what you say or don't say this coming Mothers' Day.

It's Just Tricky, Margot Starbuck

"God couldn't be everywhere, so he gave us mothers."

The church signboard I passed on my morning walk rattled me. Is God always so sorely limited? Did God give the addicted mother of the passing driver who beat ...

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Displaying 1–5 of 7 comments

Donald McLean

May 06, 2014  9:50am

Every year this comes up. If we do something for mothers, we are hurting those who are not mothers. If we ignore Mother's Day, we hurt those who are. If we make too much of "mothering" we hurt those whose mothers were mean or spiteful or abandoned them or have passed away. If we make too little of "mothering" we hurt those who are in the midst of giving their life to it. My approach as a pastor? "Happy Mother's Day to all you moms! Now let's talk about Jesus. Turn in your Bible please...."

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Tim Feather

May 05, 2014  1:31pm

One of the saddest experiences I every encountered was a church board meeting when the merits of celebrating Mother's Day were debated. Many of the issues raised by these three women were brought up as objections to any sort of recognition of Mother's Day. It reached a level of dysfunction so that the Board voted that the church should do absolutely nothing and ignore Mother's Day altogether. The flip side of the coin was then all those who came to church that Sunday expecting some sort of maternal focus and got nothing whatsoever.

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Michelle Sabin

May 05, 2014  11:05am

Thank you for your article and for the courage of these women to be vulnerable in regards to their feelings about Mother's Day. I am a pastor--but I am also a daughter who was molested by her father and I am a mother who has lost an 18-year-old. I am keenly aware that those who rejoice in the day sit along side those who weep when they find themselves trying to find the right mother's day card. I personly believe Mother's Day is a Hallmark Day, while Sunday is the Lord's Day. Let us acknowledge Mother's Day in our greeting, and then praise God!

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Sharon Hurkens

May 05, 2014  10:39am

I also appreciate the "hearts" of those in the article but must add that Mothers are to be honored. This is just the reality of those wonderful sacrificing women who give the all to our children. I too have suffered six miscarriages and have not been able to bare children, but know that we rejoice with those who rejoice and cry with those who cry. This is a wonderful celebration day coming up and we celebrate God's miraculous creation, birth. I am a female pastor, ready to rejoice with the mothers in the congregation.

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May 05, 2014  10:30am

I agree the wonderful and privileged responsibility Mothers have been given by God to serve their children, by being loving to their Fathers, examples and mentors to them, should not be ignored, just because others, for whatever reason have not maybe been able to biologically have children, they too could be Mother's in Israel. I have a close friend, who has been just like a Mother to a little girl from Afghanastan, she can have such a great impact on that young life! For those dear souls who have lost a child, we have to believe God is still Sovereign and as CS Lewis said: "We have to trust God's heart, when we cannot trace His hand." Of all people in the world, Mother's need to be remembered and praised!

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