Al Janssen writes in "The Marriage Masterpiece":

I am struck, as I reflect on the vows Jo and I exchanged at our wedding, by the one-sidedness of our commitment. There were no qualifiers or disclaimers. I promised to love Jo for better or worse until death, regardless of her actions or attitude. Likewise, Jo promised to have me for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, for life, regardless of how well or poorly I behaved. No doubt we both assumed we'd reciprocate in our love for each other. However, our vows said nothing about being loved back. By our words, each of us assumed 100 percent responsibility for the marriage. That's the nature of covenant. Each party makes an irrevocable vow.

When the husband places the wedding ring on his wife's finger, in the traditional marriage service, he says, "With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow." In other words, the husband gave everything he had to his wife, including his body and his earthly possessions. No longer were there his or her possessions. Everything was theirs. Why is this important? Because in giving our all, we actually gain what we want.