In Jean-Claude Van Damme’s biographical, semi-fictionalized movie JCVD, the actor plays himself as someone whose family and career has spiraled downward and finds himself a hostage in the middle of a post office robbery in his hometown of Brussels, Belgium. In an important scene, he looks straight into the camera and delivers a monologue about his life.

(Editor’s Note: This is an edited version of the full video clip mentioned below).

I was blessed and had a lot of wives. I always believed in love ... When you got it all, you travel the world. When you’ve been in all the hotels, you’re the prima donna of the penthouse. And in all the hotels the world over, traveling, you want something more. What about drugs? Because of a woman, well because of love, I tried something and I got hooked. Van Damme, the beast, the tiger in a cage, the Bloodsport man got hooked. I was wasted mentally and physically ...

[As a teenager] I asked [to be a star]. I asked for it, really believed in it. When you’re 13, you believe in your dream. Well, it came true for me. But I still ask myself today what I’ve done on this earth. Nothing! I’ve done nothing! And I might just die in this post office, hoping to start all over here in Belgium, in my country, where my roots are. Start all over with my parents and get my health back, pick up again.