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Comparing Our Bodies to an Amusement Park Ride

The Week magazine runs a column called "What's Next?," a regular contest based on current events. In a recent issue they asked readers to submit answers to the following question:

The TV chef Anthony Bourdain recently advised: "Your body is not a temple, it's an amusement park. Enjoy the ride." What would be a good name for a theme park ride based on the typical American's body?

Here were some of the best answers:

  • Sedentary Mountain
  • Cholester-Roll
  • Plumper Cars
  • Tunnel of Love Handles
  • The Tragic Kingdom
  • The Expanding Universe
  • SORRY—ride closed due to poor maintenance

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