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A Stage-4 Cancer Patient Still Feels Loved By God

Kate Bowler is an associate professor of the history of Christianity in North America at Duke Divinity School. Kate has terminal cancer and has written a new memoir, Everything Happens For A Reason: And Other Lies I've Loved. In a recent interview on NPR's Fresh Air, Bowler was asked about how she managed to feel loved by God even in the aftermath of major cancer surgery.

Bowler said that of course she wanted a long life with her husband and son. But she also discovered what she called a gift—she realized how fragile life is for everyone. And that realization connected her with the pain of other people. Here are Bowler's own words:

It's like you notice the tired mom in the grocery store who's just like struggling to get the thing off the top shelf while her kid screams, and you notice how very tired that person looks at the bus stop. And then, of course, all the people in the cancer clinic around me. That felt like I was cracked open, and I could see everything really clearly for the first time. And the other bit was not feeling nearly as angry as I thought I would. And, I mean, granted—like I have been pretty angry at times. But it was mostly that I felt God's presence. And it was less like, here are some important spiritual truths I know intellectually about God. There are four of them. I have a PowerPoint presentation. It was instead more like the way you'd feel a friend or like someone holding you. I just didn't feel quite as scared. I just felt loved [by God].

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