Sermon Illustrations
Survey about the Long-term Effects of Grief and Loss
In April, 2011, Slate asked their readers to respond to a survey about grief and loss. Apparently the idea struck a nerve, as nearly 10,000 people responded. The results included the following:
- 78 percent of the respondents were females (which could suggest that more females read Slate or that more women feel free to discuss issues around grief and loss).
- 33 percent of the respondents had lost a loved one eight or more years ago, "suggesting the continual presence of loss."
- 60 percent of the respondents dreamt about the lost loved one.
- Only 7 percent of mourners felt it was "completely true" that they received adequate support from others.
- Nearly 30 percent felt alone with their grief most of the time.
- 13 percent said they felt alone in their grief all of the time.
- Nearly 25 percent said they "never went back to feeling like themselves after their loss"; another 25 percent said they felt normal only "one to two years" after the loss.
After analyzing the statistics, the authors made the following observations:
- "One of the hardest aspects of mourning is feeling that one's own grief is somehow not 'normal,' or has gone unrecognized."
- "Many respondents wanted to explain how 'uncomfortable' (a word that appeared over and over) they felt their grief had made others [feel] …. The responses seem to suggest both an expectation [from others] that [grievers] should grieve a little and the concurrent desire that the mourner should not grieve too much."
- In pondering "why recognition from others is so important" in the grieving process, the authors conclude: "It may be as simple as our human need to feel we are not alone when grief gets unbearable."