Introduction:

·        Illustration: a girl is taught that she only has some many words to use during her lifetime, so she became quiet thinking she could extend her life.

·        There is more to speaking effectively than being able to string words together.

·        Illustration: recalling a Dick Van Dyke show episode, May relates a comment Dick made about a talkative guest, “He has the ability to say things which are on the surface seemingly vague, but in reality are actually meaningless!”

·        Scripture teaches us to use our words sparingly and to speak with caution

·        Illustration: the Department of Agriculture needed 15,629 words to discuss the pricing of cabbage, but Jesus only needed 56 words in the Lord’s Prayer.

We should first consider not saying anything at all.

·        We don’t have to say everything we know.

- Illustration: May relates a story of a friend who repeated rumors of a personal nature about a well-known Christian singer. Whether the rumor was true or false, talking about the artist’s personal matters was unkind and did not build up a fellow believer.

-                                Proverbs 17:27

·        We don’t have to say everything we think.

-                          Short illustration: Cliff Claven, a character on the TV show Cheers, is a self proclaimed authority on anything and everything and has to enter every conversation in the bar. Every group of friends has a member like Cliff.  Take a long, hard look at yourself to see if you are a Cliff in your circle of friends.

-                          Proverbs 17:28

·        We can give the impression that we are wise if we keep silent.

-                          Illustration: May relates a personal story about keeping quiet on a new job when he didn’t understand the conversation.  Later, when the topic turned to something he knew, his remarks impressed everyone.  His silence allowed him to establish and preserve credibility.

·        We don’t have to repeat everything we hear.

-                          Proverbs 16:28

-                          Proverbs 17:9

We should consider whether or not we have all the facts.

·        Illustration:  May tells the story of Richard Jewell, a security guard who was a hero during the 1996 Olympics.  He reported a suspicious finding, but the FBI decided Jewell might be the suspected terrorist.  The press soon joined the FBI in assuming he was guilty and making him appear to be a loser and a criminal to the general public.  It turned out that Richard Jewell really was a hero, and a number of news organizations paid him a lot of money to cover their embarrassment and avoid the bad publicity they would get during a public trial.

·        If we open our mouths before having all the facts, we will do damage to others and our reputations.

-        Proverbs 18:13

-        Short illustration: May recounts an incident when his boss responded erratically to an invoice by blaming an employee and canceling his contract with the supplier only to discover that he was to blame for the mistake on the invoice.  He could not undo the damage because the employee had already resigned and the supplier raised the contract renewal price.

-        Proverbs 14:3

-        Proverbs 17:27

We should consider the best way to say what needs to be said.

·        Proverbs 15:23

·        Short illustration: saying the wrong thing to a state trooper when being pulled over for speeding resulted in a huge fine.

·        Illustration: A loving husband fixed his wife a sandwich using a heel of the bread.  The wife got angry and in frustration asked him why, for 20 years, he had always given her the heel of the bread instead of the nice center slices.  The husband replied quietly, “Because the heel is my favorite piece.” His quiet answer was the best answer.

·        Proverbs 15:1

·        Short illustration: A woman remarks, “My husband has a way of telling me to do something that makes me want to do the exact opposite of whatever he says.”  The problem is not that she refuses to submit.  The husband needs to learn how to communicate in a gentler manner.

·        Proverbs 18:21

·        Words have tremendous power, and we need to make sure we use them carefully.

-        Proverbs 13:3

-        Proverbs 10:19

·        In guarding our lips, we guard our lives, we strengthen our relationships, and we build up others to a closer walk with Christ.